A while. It has been quite a while since I have written anything, even just a little thing. It happens sometimes, it comes and goes. Hopefully it's back now. what I need to be able to write.
I have had quite a few things to do. and I have been lazy when I hadn't had anything to do. sometimes I am not sure if I am lazy, or just forgetting something crucially important.
Anyways. I am Denmark now. Visiting my grandmother, she lives close to the ocean, a beach where I used to play when I was younger. It's not the same beach anymore though. I went there a few days ago with my brother. We went for a walk, and I was looking forward to playing with him where I used to play.
You could hardly see the sand anymore though, it was covered in plastic. Lighters, nets, bits and pieces everywhere. My brother picked up such an odly shaped piece, he believed it first to be a funny rock. I stopped looking. I didn't want to see it, so my eyes shifted to the sea. It was quite a foggy day, so it was hard to tell where the sea ended and the sky began. I like those kind of days, the world seems like a bigger place to me, when you cannot see it.
Both me and my brother kept looking at the ocean. Neither of us wanted to look at the beach. We didn't forget it though, I promise, I will remember, and I will do something, I will do anything I can. But in that moment, we both chose to close our eyes, too tired to deal with it, saving the problems for another day. That was me that afternoon. And I am sorry. I would like to say that I immediately grabbed a bag, and started picking up as much trash as I could, save the planet, save the whales, fairtrade or whatever it is these days, but I didn't. I just looked out at the ocean with my brothers hand in mine, enjoying what little time I get to spend with him.
He is growong up. Getting bigger, and I am not really around to see that. I missed his last two birthdays. I have missed christmas for two years. He is five years old now, and I am only getting further away from him. We did however go for a two hour walk together, I had to carry him the last bit of course, he was so tired he could hardly walk up the hill. And we did feed Three horses on the way back. And we went to the shop so he could get an ice cream, despite it being -5 C outside. And we did get to talk. He is wise for a five year old.
He has in mind to be an acrobat and a gentleman when he grows up. Then he jumps around the livingroom looking like a genntleman, or in his case, slightly constapeted, and telling everyone that the moon is made out of a ball of vanilla icecream.
Now he is in copenhagen.
I stayed at the westcoast, by the sea. I go to the beach often. Thinking. There is no place like the sea for that kind of thing. The wind is raging outside today, I can hear it from my room. The house is warm though, warmer than in Sweden, too warm sometimes, too warm for January. way too warm for January. I think you can hear the worlds smallest violin playing for me where ever you are my friend.
I wish you fair winds and a following sea.
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