A good day

Today was a good day. Like a really good day. It has been a really long time, but i suppose today was a testimony to the old saying "when you hit bottom, the only place left to go is up."  Usually it turns out that bottom has a basement, but not today. Today was a good day.

I recently went back to navigation school. I was kind of conflicted about it, cause i am not sure what my nautical future looks like, or if there will even be one at all.  Also exam stress didn't really seem like an attractive option, but today i did a navigation test exam with one of my friends and it didn't go as bad as one might have expected which naturally gave me a little confidence boost, "unfortunately" to the point where i, in a moments madness, said yes to join another friend for a cross fit session.

I can honestly say that i was surprised to realise how similar to jelly my body is. It was unexpected. As i was doing sit-ups and push ups, and some other exercises that my ass was clearly to large to agree with, i started thinking about why anyone would agree to voluntarily torture themselves, and then it hit me. Despite the agonising pain, and the embarrassment in realising that even heavy smokers were doing better than me, i was enjoying myself. I was having fun.

And also i later realised that this exercise gave me the excuse to be very unsocial in my room tonight without giving a fuck about what others think of that, since i so loudly proclaimed that my muscles where planning on murdering me, and i would need to go straight to bed because of it.

Which brings me to this blog. It has been a while since you have heard from me.  Between the studying, the walking, and the various panic attacks that has taken up my time recently, i have not been writing a lot. Which i do regret. And i will try to change that, as i do find a relief in writing, one that would probably make studying easier as well.

Is it too late to make a new years resolution? All that "new year new me" -bullshit doesn't really seem to work anyway, so instead, how about just making a promise. And you my friend will be my witness. I will write more from now on. I think i need to, even if only for me to see. I think i need to write more, i need to prioritise writing. I need to put that, if not first, then at least second to walking. And then exams.

 remember that my friend, as i was close to forget it: exams are important, and school is important on that much we can agree. But If you forget to take care of yourself, just a little bit, then who are you really going to school for?  you, or for those who want you to?

Today has been a really good day. I studied, i worked out, i wrote, and i took care of myself. And that is more important than i gave it credit for. I forgot how it felt like to feel this well. I thought there to be no reason to do the little things. But there is. I beg you old friend. Don't make the same mistake.

I wish you fair winds and following seas.